A Part Of Me
 by DarlaDru

Angel was left alone in the darkened graveyard, a shadow among shadows. Crouched beside Buffy’s headstone, he told her about everything that had happened to him since he last spoke to her; too long ago.
He told her everything. For the first time in what seemed to be a thousand lifetimes, Angel was able to tell Buffy everything.
The moon crept across the clouded sky, in a moment, in a personal eternity. For Angel, time was erratic. He wanted to stay in this moment forever. Then he watched the frozen sky, looked down upon Buffy’s resting place, and wanted it to be over.
Suddenly, Angel stopped whispering to the unhearing stone. A new rush of tears came to his eyes as he realised what he was doing. “Why couldn’t I have been able to do this when she was alive?”
As a crystal tear rolled down his face, from somewhere distant, Angel heard a faint song. He sat in silence, listening intently to the words, a flood of memories coming to him. Angel felt light headed, as the memories that now tugged at him mind took form. But they weren’t all his, some of them belonged to someone else.

Everybody’s got something they had to leave behind.
One regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time.
There’s no use looking back or wondering
How it could be now or neither been
All this I know but still I can’t find ways to let you down.

Buffy stared with tear-filled eyes at the ring, just sitting on her bedside table. She picked it up with shaky pale hands as the tears began to form and roll onto her sweater.   For a moment she stood lifeless, all her world in that one ring. Angel’s ring. She rolled it over in her hand, carefully at first. But, as her anger built inside her she squeezed it hard, forcing it to cut into her hand. It was anger at herself, for having to kill Angel. She should have been there. Just a few moments more and Angel would be here still. Anger at Angel, for all the hurt he had caused. All shown in the small piece of jewellery.

Somewhere in my memory, I lost all sense of time
And tomorrow can never be
‘Cause yesterday is all that fills my mind.
There’s no use looking back or wondering
How it should be now or neither been
Oh this I know but still I can’t find ways to let you go.

You’ll always be the dream that fills my head

Because love is a strange and funny thing

In her dreams, Angel was alive. Buffy felt him there. Even though in her dreams he was not always Angel, Buffy still loved him. Even if he pushed her away, blood seeping from the wound she gave him, she wanted to touch him. Days went by, but Buffy couldn’t say how many. All that filled her days were memories of her past life. Only a few moments, and Angel would still be here.

No matter how I try and try
I just can’t say goodbye

Angel shifted. He shared Buffy’s feelings, and he knew how much she had been through. She understood. At that moment Angel could almost feel Buffy. “She wanted me to know.” The pain Angel felt inside had grown until he felt numb. His mouth opened in a silent scream, as he wanted it to go. But maybe he deserved this…

I never had a dream come true
Till the day that I found you
Even though I pretend that I’ve moved on
You’ll always be my baby
I never found the words to say
You’re the one I think about each day
And I know no matter where love takes me to
A part of me will always be with you.

Memories of moments with joy and love now crowded Angel’s head, and found their way into his heart.
The love they shared was special and Buffy was always in his thoughts even when he had left. Both of them tried to move on in their paths, but each always knew the others heart. Even if it didn’t always show. Buffy’s last gift to Angel wasn’t a ring. Angel smiled, even as the headstone filled his vision. A moment of perfect happiness.

“A part of me will always be with you…”